December 2010
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It's New Year's Eve!
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DINOSAURS WILL DIE
Extinction never felt so good.
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My dad just offered me ham.
And I was like
Seriously. Has he ever met me?
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brb getting a weave for my armpits
warningdontreadthis:
mom: Aren’t you going yet?
me: I’ll go in a couple of hours.
mom: Are there any buses driving then?
me: Yeah.
mom: What if a drunk person comes in and tries to rape you?
me:
My mom is exactly the same way. I’m like “I’m just going to see The Tourist then my friend’s house…” So she’s goes into something like “A DRUNK...
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I want it to be 7:15, Friday right now.
I just need some time with friends. My family is driving me CRAZY.
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New years resolution
ifwewerefeckless:
continue being awesome
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sugar-t1ts:
0lightenupmorrissey:
colingreenwood-:
why don’t Americans do Christmas Crackers they sound fun!
DO YOU NOT HAVE CRACKERS IN AMERICA
you shit me, no crackers ?
We definitely have crackers. But christmas crackers? WTF is that?
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sugar-t1ts:
my mum actually gets upset if you listen to anything “heavy” so i have to keep switching song every like 3 tracks or she starts going I DON’T LIKE THISSSSSS over and over in a weird child’s voice
now do you see why I am such a twat
it’s genetic
Exactly how my mother is. She only likes The Beatles and Mumford and Sons. :/
THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER GOOD ARTISTS.
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torture
bperz:
I’ve been allergic to most fruit since 2001 (the entire time I’ve been with my husband). This year for Christmas my mother-in-law gave me a huge beautiful chocolate caramel apple. This is pure torture! Apples used to be my favorite thing. Seriously, I’d eat at least one a day, every day (probably why I’m now allergic, grrr). So there it is, sitting on the kitchen counter taunting me...
I did this for like 15 minutes. BEST EVER.
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rootofginger:
Each year, there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.
True Story: I know someone who dropped a toilet on their foot and broke their toe.
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I can't tell if I'm sleepy, thirsty or bored.
Story of my life.